Do not ask me if it worked or not…because i am not sure if it did. i find myself back at one all over again.
I look at myself now at peace and doing so much better. I have given myself away and loved truly and fairly for 2.5 years staying in a rough marriage. I gave love and stayed committed, I ran a good race. I pat myself at the back and congratulate myself.
Its hard to stay married during hard times and I was determined to make it through. I chose to start with my healing first so I could deal with my challenges later. It’s actually hard to deal with infidelity no matter how much you can try to heal, it hits you hard at some point.
His girlfriend told me he found happiness in my husband and tried to hide their relationship, but I discovered for myself, she did not stalk me or do something that would make me notice her. She had respected me and still respects me. Her words. I was broke and dry, no car. He took my money and “built” a home with his girlfriend. She says she found happiness, she gets everything she wants from him, she means my money I was funding them thinking I was investing in the family business and building; I was asking myself where the money was going. He was pissed that I had all the proof and every bit of information I needed.
They connived and tried to send me to prison for knowing my rights as a wife and having information. I am not sure how long they wanted me locked up for. Silly them telling the truth to the domestic violence unit only to discover how ill-advised they were. I was called by the unit hoping to help me “fix” my marriage. They told me about the new couple opening a case against me only to find that I had more information that them as the police. They listened to me with shock. The police then told me they dismiss them with no file against. I never imagined my own husband sending me to prison all in the name of love for another woman. He could have just divorced me, I would gladly give him divorce without a fight.
He finally got the courage at the police station, well, on another day to tell me he didn’t want to hear me speak or breathe, he wants nothing to do with me. I gladly packed for my children and myself in the company of my family and left knowing very well karma was alive and watching. I focused on building myself up and getting a safe home for myself and the children. I did just that depending on hand outs and prayer. I was successful.
I look back at all these, almost gave me a heart attack. I look at myself now. Girl, you made it. My children are growing up beautifully. My life is coming up ok. I was no house wife, I am employed full time, 8am-5pm job, you get home tired and still do some chores and play with the babies, that has kept me alive. I am doing absolutely great and karma has started serving some soup on the other side; entrée.
He confiscated his car so I could be grounded or stranded. I got used to buses I would ask around the hood until I got used to the new route and charges..oh and rain…it was all for a good cause. Building me up to help others and the rain watering me for better days to come. It has been a rough four months that feels like a decade.
I am still married to him until I decide what I am to do with him and his life. I am waiting for him to heal if he has to and come back to his senses. Life has a way of teaching you LIFE. I have not lost a thing…..i am winning although staying married now is really really tough.